Taylor Swift – aka the most annoying little sh1t in the whole world – has released details about the ‘love of her life’ – Diet Coke.
Of course though, the love is really all about money, because she’s signed what is presumably a multi-million dollar sponsorship deal with them – which means she’ll be an ambassador for the brand, much in the way Beyoncé is for
live music Pepsi.
Yes, the 23-year-old is now selling that crappy, aspartame-packed fizzy drink – that is of no nutritional benefit whatsoever and is being blamed (partly) for the rise in childhood obesity as it screws up your body’s ability to regulate calorie intake – to her army of child fans.
And, if that didn’t leave an artificially-sweet taste in your mouth, her statement about the deal will. ’I wanted to share some news with you, because we’re finally making it official with one of the great loves of my life…Diet Coke,’ said Swifter in a youtube vid.
Then hilariously, she adds: ‘I’ve said for years that Diet Coke just ‘gets me’ and my lifestyle. I’m so excited about our new partnership.’
Is it a fizzy drink or a brand of tampon? – How exactly does Diet Coke ‘get’ the mystery that is Taylor Swift’s lifestyle? And the photo above is the reason why photoshop was invented.
If by that she means that execs at the brand look down on her flinging herself at one boy after another then writing break-up songs about them when they fail to propose, then that could be what she’s getting at.
I was working on Taylor and on again, off again man-child love Harry Styles meeting up at the NRJ Awards in Cannes over the weekend. I’ll do you up some details later.