I apologise in this for advance, last post about Beyoncé for today, I promise. The 31-year-old lip syncher has talked about the miscarriage that Jay-Z first hinted at in 'Glory' which was the track he released shortly after Blue Ivy's birth last year.
"About two years ago, I was pregnant for the first time," she admits in her upcoming HBO documentary. "And I heard the heartbeat, which was the most beautiful music I ever heard in my life. "I picked out names, I envisioned what my child would look like . . . I was feeling very maternal." But early on something went wrong: "I flew back to New York to get my check up - and no heartbeat," she says. "Literally the week before I went to the doctor, everything was fine, but there was no heartbeat."
Beyoncé then poured her heartache out in her music: "I went into the studio and wrote the saddest song I've ever written in my life.
"And it was actually the first song I wrote for my album. And it was the best form of therapy for me, because it was the saddest thing I've ever been through."
I actually wince a bit when people talk about private medical issues - it's a crazy British thing where we only talk about our maladies through a stiff upper lip - but given that Beyoncé's such a big star I think it's a good thing she's talking about miscarriage, which is often discussed in hushed tones. So many women go through early-stage miscarriages and often both the mother and father don't talk about their feelings because they're struggling to stay strong for the other. I think it happens a lot more than we realise, and usually wrongly because guilt is an unfortunate side-effect of grief, they beat themselves up and worry it was that one glass of wine they had before they found out or that flight they took or the stress they were under from trying to get pregnant in the first place. It's extremely traumatic and I think that not only with miscarriages, but also with the negative sides of pregnancy and childbirth women don't talk enough about the downsides. I don't know why, but often I blame the 'bully brigade' who go around talking about how wonderful it all is, with no idea that they're upsetting the women who have struggled. So whilst I'm over-bored of Beyoncé-fever, it's commendable she's opened up about it if it helps other women feel less alone, for whatever reason she did it.  

About Jen Paul (BOHOMOTH)

Jenny Paul is a veteran showbiz reporter who is based in Cannes in the south of France. She has worked on major breaking news stories over the past decade and more for entertainment news outlets worldwide including: Us Weekly (USA), People magazine (USA), E! News (USA) ABC News (USA), The New York Post (USA), The Sun (UK), The Mirror (UK), The Daily Mail, (UK), The Mail on Sunday (UK) and many others too numerous to mention. She firmly believes that love, truth, hugs, dogs and the power of laughter make the world a better place.
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  1. Snevhead says:

    Hear hear, Boho. That is all.

  2. jojo says:

    A miscarriage is one of the worst experiences ever, I wonder how far along she was ?
    I was 10 weeks and didn’t have a clue I was pregnant (always been irregular) until I woke up bleeding, then being raced to the emergency room and hearing you’re miscarrying ….
    I heard no heartbeat was totally unaware but it changes you, it changed me. And the hormones no one talks about that…it took close to a year to be myself again..and the guilt, I didn’t plan a child it was an accident but I felt responsible for the loss.
    I have a great doctor who took the time to explain how many woman miscarry and are never aware of it, sometimes it just the body protecting itself …not all pregnancies are meant to come to term, very often if theres something wrong your body will reject it.
    However knowing this really didn’t help it took time.

    • Shiny says:

      Oh Jojo, you poor thing. I’ve some close friends who’ve been through it and it’s horrific experience. Some find it hard to come to terms with it until they are pregnant again – and even holding a baby in their arms.

    • BOHOMOTH says:

      I’m sorry to hear that jojo and that it took such a long time to recover. I hope you’re feeling better now but these things do change you, it’s true. My friend had one baby, then a whole series of miscarriages. The relationship with her husband really suffered as they were both in so much pain and the only person that dad talked to about it was me. He was in floods of tears, saying he thought it was his fault because he was overweight. I told him what your doctor said but there was a lot of hurt and anger and blaming on both sides and they split eventually. Very sad. I have a few friends who think they may have miscarried but in the first week or two and I think that happens to maybe 1 in 2 women. But, it’s the same grief you experience with any bereavement – hence the totally unnecessary guilt (which is one of the cruelest things) and the fact that there’s nothing anyone can say to make you feel better other than listen and be there. It’s just time, like you say. I’ve often wondered with Beyoncé if she did fake the Blue pregnancy the miscarriage is why and I’ve got a feeling it was more than one time it happened but I could be wrong. Jay-Z’s very forcefully saying they won’t have another one so maybe they can’t face that heartache again.

      • jojo says:

        I do know that’s it’s more common now than ever, my friend is going through IVF she simply decided that just because she hasn’t met the right man that it shouldn’t stop her from having her dream….
        From what she’s experienced so far it’s not going to be easy …

        • BOHOMOTH says:

          I hope it does work for her eventually. I’ve always thought it seems really hardcore, especially doing the injections on your own and then having those hormones swooshing around.

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  5. Sugartits says:

    Miscarraiges are hell, no diggity, the hardest thing ever.

    But the timing of Beyonce suddenly ‘opening up’ about this sad issue, whilst coincidentally being caught up in a negative scandal, leaves a very, very, unpleasant taste in my mouth.

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