Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin: A Change is as Good as a Rest (or a Cleanse)

From a celebrity that I totally heart to one I completely loathe or, to be more precise, two I completely loathe. In much the same way that you never see Harry Styles and Kanye West together, a sighting of IT’S GWIIIN and Chris Martin together is about as common as seeing Angelina holding hands with Jennifer Aniston. Martins But here they are, spotted over Christmas in Hawaii, celebrating their tenth anniversary.  Don’t they look thrilled to be with each other? Goop looks like she’s wishing she was anywhere else than with her James Blunt look-alike hubby.  Maybe she’s just annoyed because perhaps Chris too-closely followed traditional tenth wedding anniversary gift etiquette and gave her a gift made from tin (imagine Gwyneth unwrapping that: “IT’S TIIIN!”). So guys, let 2014 be a year of change - Chris: stop being the dullest man alive; and Goop: stop ramming your lifestyle/slimming/parenting/living tips down our throats. Let’s just enjoy the silence for a while… Gwyneth Paltrow Gif Gifs via

About Ant0scar

Ant0scar first came to prominence as the inspiration behind Roland Mouret’s White Collection. Having subsequently turned his attention to writing, he has been twice nominated as best writer on Bohomoth and hopes to soon turn his love of short stories into a Day-Time Emmy Award, an Oscar and possibly a Grammy. When he’s not negotiating lower sauvignon blanc prices, Ant0scar enjoys socializing with Kate Moss, street-dancing and advanced dressage. He lives in exile with his husband on a barge with four imaginary Great Danes, a tarantula and a cardboard cut-out of Beyoncé. He must never be challenged...
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13 Responses to Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin: A Change is as Good as a Rest (or a Cleanse)

  1. Jen Paul says:

    Ha! God, why do they even bother? I was earwigging on Chris backstage at an awards bash down here once. He was sat cross legged next to Bob Geldof and they were all serious and deep in conversation while Gwen Stefani’s harajuku girl backing dancers were skipping around with bags of Haribo sweets giggling and frolicking and everyone else was valiantly sinking the free cocktails from the overflowing bar. Chris…….was eating an apple.

  2. Pamela says:

    They are annoying together.

  3. Anonymous says:

    She’ll hold on, I bet she doesn’t go into her own pocket for a thing…he’s her money pit.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Chris Martin would have to be the smuggest, dullest, try-hard wannabe rock dude of all time. He’s a disgrace to the music industry. I know where I want to stick that apple (please note, not the progeny)

  5. No wonder she spends so much of her time trying to make us interested in her – her ‘other half’ would rather reorganise his organic stock drawer than hang out with her.

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