Goodness, the hawks are really circling over the future corpse of Tara Reid.
The American pie trainwreck is recovering from a bout of food poisoning and a jetski injury that interrupted her three-month bender on the Mediterranean with a hospital visit last week. TMZ reported that she is suffering from Acute Pancreatitis but Tara’s alcoholism came up with a cover when it found out it wouldn’t be able to drink for as long as six months.
Always chipper, Tara’s Celebrity Big Brother co-contestants, Irish ‘pop sensations’ Jedward showed up to help her
knock back rose on some Russian millionaire’s tab recuperate.
The popcorn pixies have been ‘walking on the beach’ (translation: make their way to Club 55 with Tara) and generally trying to steal Rihanna and Chris Brown’s thunder, with full-height hair and matching outfits.
You know that they are fully trying to get international exposure from book-ending Reid’s near life-less bag of bones. Who wears thick trainers and a buttoned tailored jacket on f*cking Pampelonne Beach?
These two gobsh*tes, that’s who. John and Edward are totally using Tara as a world stage upon which to showcase how wacky and different they are. She’s half or fully in the bag most of the time so probably thinks they’re a hallucination.
Now I do hope that they are giving her a bit of comic relief from the reports on her health of recent, and in fairness to them, that they are showcasing what it’s like to be sober and full of energy.
Probably not though.
‘Where are those imps who put my fags in my hand?’
At least we know they’re not gay. No self respecting homo would let their friend go out dressed like this.