SURI CRUISE RETURNS TO NEW YORK AFTER A HAPPY, CLAPPY THANKSGIVING WITH DEVOTED DADDY TOM CRUISE IN JOLLY OLD ENGLAND

So we’re supposed to believe this week that Suri Cruise was flown from New York to Luton airport in the UK last Tuesday and then whisked to a swish hotel in Hertfordshire – where ‘father’ Tom Cruise had rented an entire wing and repainted one of the bedrooms pink so the pair could spend Thanksgiving together.

But miraculously, not one pap picture was taken of her arriving, departing or catching piggy back rides around London on Tom’s back whilst she was in the UK.

Not one eye-witness has come forward to say they saw the pair together and there’s no twitter sightings or cellphone pictures on the entire internet to corroborate this story in any way- save for ‘says a source’ quotes on Cruise’s official mouthpiece People magazine’s website.

Personally, I call bullsh-t.

Yes, it’s what Tom’s people want us to believe and Katie clearly went along with it, but then she’s gone along with far more outrageous scenarios over the past six years so why stop now?

Whatever happened, Suri’s now back at The Avenues school in New York City (where she’s probably been all along) – after Katie posed up for photos to make it look like she went to the Holmes family home in Ohio arriving and leaving the airport on her own (not difficult to then leave the airport via a back exit and be whisked away in a waiting blacked out car).

It was business as usual for Tom at the weekend- who was filming in London’s Leicester Square and shut the entire area off for several hours on Sunday morning – with paps fully able to locate him after several days with their Cruise GPS locators seemingly turned to ‘off’.

You know, skulduggery’s par for the course in Hollywood with regard to relationships between two co-stars and so on, but it always sticks in my craw when it seems as if a six-year-old child’s being used to bolster a movie-star’s popularity and perceived sense of normality with the public – especially when said kid looks so miserable.