HOW TO LOSE A MAN IN TEN MINUTES: TAYLOR SWIFT SWIPES A BABY AND PLAYS AT BEING PRETEND MARRIED WITH HARRY STYLES AT THE ZOO

As John Mayer, Taylor Lautner, Cory Montieth, and Conor Kennedy prepare to release their co-written song entitled: ‘It’s not me- it’s you and it always was’ about Taylor Swift, the country slapper was busy slipping her stalking GPS chip into One Direction’s Harry Styles’ pocket in New York over the weekend.

 

The 22-year-old heartbreak Princess took British boy-bander and supposed cougar boffer Harry Styles to New York’s Central Park zoo to show him a load of incarcerated animals as a salutary warning that he too will end up in her basement in a cage with a pool ball duck-taped across his mouth if he doesn’t text her back a sufficient amount of times in one day or worse- dares to dump her.

But so as not to arise too much suspicion she swiped a random passerby’s baby so she could imagine them this time next year when they’ve got married and had a child together.

As you can see- Harry’s side-eyeing that child as he considers the prospect of a life as Mr. Swift-Styles and at one stage actually clutches his chest at the onset of a panic attack as it dawns on him what he’s got himself into.

Harry, who is only 18, probably just wanted a bit of American fanny as he’d heard from The Wanted that they give better head than Brits and instead when he told Taylor he wanted to play mummies and daddies for the day this is what he got.


As they wander off, Harry’s wishing he’d just stayed in his hotel room alone and had a Tommy Tank while Taylor’s planning their wedding in her head and writing their vows and even picking out each of her bridesmaids.

 

Yes, sea-lion, that’s my reaction too.

This entry was posted in Celebrity, Slider and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.
 
Related On Partner Sites
 

9 Responses to HOW TO LOSE A MAN IN TEN MINUTES: TAYLOR SWIFT SWIPES A BABY AND PLAYS AT BEING PRETEND MARRIED WITH HARRY STYLES AT THE ZOO

  1. Jay says:

    Haha this is gold Boho!

    I know so many girls like this, they jump from guy to guy, not in an slutty way, but in this ‘Disney-Princess/Rose-tined-glasses’ way hoping to land their soulmate. Or just labeling any guy that glances at them their soul mate. Anyway, as we’ve gotten older, sadly, they are the ones that have ended up alone..

  2. Shiny says:

    Coffee. Spit. Screen.

  3. sameoleshit says:

    The baby is the groups stylist. Taylor really needs to take a moment to reflect on why she goes through guys like underwear. I’m sure she could come up with some wonderful songs based on that. I guess Harry has learned everything he needed to from the cougars of the world and is going to share this knowledge with the younger ladies.

  4. Kristy says:

    Is that Kimberley Stewart (Rod’s daughter) with the baby? Looks very similar.

  5. Sassy says:

    what the hell is wrong with this girl that she thinks every guy has to be THE ONE – Taylor you’re at an age where you should be having MANY fun ones until you meet the one….you’ll never recognize him now the way your’e going …

  6. cal says:

    She has that cra-cra look

    • sylly says:

      I’ve never cared for her music; thought her lyrics were insipid and uninspired, and was horrified the first time I heard her try to sing live with Stevie Nicks. Hell, if you can make Stevie sound like she actually rehearsed, you are a very bad singer.

      So, why is she so famous? I’m puzzled. And, yeah, she is stalker-crazy on top of it. When will her 15 minutes be up? Because I’ve been sick of this talentless mess for awhile now. Kanye knew what he was about.

  7. Pingback: JUSTIN BIEBER Movie In The Works And Other Entertainment News | Latest Hollywood Celebrity Gossip | Entertainment News - Anything Hollywood

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

293721_10151633767146774_1583274511_n

Jennifer Lawrence Gets Her Kit Off To Film X-Men Sequel

Wow. She might have scales, yellow eyes and orange hair (not unlike a detoxing MORE...

thumb.php

66th Cannes Film Festival: Pale and Thin Michael Douglas Says Catherine Zeta-Jones Is ‘Raring to Go’ After Treatment

Matt Damon and Michael Douglas landed in Cannes for the film festival yesterday and MORE...

Blood Ties Film Premiere

66th Cannes Film Festival: Zoe Saldana Pretty But Underwhelming in Valentino

Talk about a *wah, wah, wah* trombone outro. Love me some Zoe Saldana. Adore MORE...

Rob and dogs move out of Kristen's

PHOTOS: It’s Over – Robert Pattinson and His Two Dogs Move out of Kristen Stewart’s House in LA

Robert Pattinson moved out of the home he shared with Kristen Stewart in a MORE...