Oooh. David Beckham has signed a tasty deal with the deep-pocketed Paris Saint-Germain – which means Posh will be able to move next door to new BFF Karl Lagerfeld and compare clavicles over a glass of Diet Coke on a daily basis.
"Yay. I think... What was the question again?"
The 37-year-old former England captain had 12 firm offers from clubs the world over (Monaco were desperate to grab Dave- aren’t we all?) but instead went for the French ligue 1 (which is not as competitive as the British Premier League) – who have spunked more than £200m in the past 18 months in a bid to line up an all-star team.
"Victoria said if I wore a beret and you wore a striped top mum we'd look all French 'n' that"
What’s this mean for The Peckhams on a personal level though?
"She might dress ze A-list but the other day I saw Stella eat ze food at a party ven Anna Vintour vas looking"
Well, Posh is busy plotting for world domination with her e-store and a flagship store in the works as well as another clothing line (it’s supposed to be less expensive than the other two but dresses are around the £1000 mark), so she’ll be based in London with the children in the week and Beck’s going to be trotting back and forth across the channel on the Eurostar.
Vic’s going to be positively slobbering at the thought of having a fourth home in Paris where, of course, her idol Coco Chanel lived and worked.
"Karl, tell me I look like Coco did in this light again"
She can lay claim to be a ‘real’ designer now rather than somebody who just ‘makes a career in fashion’ (© Karl Lagerfeld) because that’s where so many other designers live.
Obviously though, Dave’s going to be laying his pretty head in the French capital several nights a week on his own as Vicky toils away in her London “office” and looks after the kids.
"Wewt. I get to live somewhere foreign on my own again"
I expect top of SkeleTor’s ‘to do’ list right now is demanding that any of David’s potential PAs include a photograph with their applications and any who are under a UK size 18 and born after 1970 will go in the bin to ensure against any potential embarrassing headlines.
As she told Elle recently, she’s a stickler for details.
LOL ‘comparing clavicles’.
That made me snigger, too