I apologise in this for advance, last post about Beyoncé for today, I promise.
The 31-year-old lip syncher has talked about the miscarriage that Jay-Z first hinted at in ‘Glory’ which was the track he released shortly after Blue Ivy’s birth last year.
“About two years ago, I was pregnant for the first time,” she admits in her upcoming HBO documentary. “And I heard the heartbeat, which was the most beautiful music I ever heard in my life.
“I picked out names, I envisioned what my child would look like . . . I was feeling very maternal.”
But early on something went wrong: “I flew back to New York to get my check up – and no heartbeat,” she says. “Literally the week before I went to the doctor, everything was fine, but there was no heartbeat.”
Beyoncé then poured her heartache out in her music: “I went into the studio and wrote the saddest song I’ve ever written in my life.
“And it was actually the first song I wrote for my album. And it was the best form of therapy for me, because it was the saddest thing I’ve ever been through.”
I actually wince a bit when people talk about private medical issues – it’s a crazy British thing where we only talk about our maladies through a stiff upper lip – but given that Beyoncé’s such a big star I think it’s a good thing she’s talking about miscarriage, which is often discussed in hushed tones.
So many women go through early-stage miscarriages and often both the mother and father don’t talk about their feelings because they’re struggling to stay strong for the other. I think it happens a lot more than we realise, and usually wrongly because guilt is an unfortunate side-effect of grief, they beat themselves up and worry it was that one glass of wine they had before they found out or that flight they took or the stress they were under from trying to get pregnant in the first place.
It’s extremely traumatic and I think that not only with miscarriages, but also with the negative sides of pregnancy and childbirth women don’t talk enough about the downsides. I don’t know why, but often I blame the ‘bully brigade’ who go around talking about how wonderful it all is, with no idea that they’re upsetting the women who have struggled.
So whilst I’m over-bored of Beyoncé-fever, it’s commendable she’s opened up about it if it helps other women feel less alone, for whatever reason she did it.