All ’round w@nk spot and golden shower fan John Mayer agrees with the world at large who think he’s acted like a complete tosser in the past.
Appearing on CBS Sunday Morning he said:
“I was just a jerk.”
Presumably he’s referring to comparing Jennifer Aniston and Jessica Simpson’s skills in bed in a Playboy magazine interview and confirming that he’d dumped Jen to a gang of paparazzi outside his New York City gym, but relax, people- John only did it all because he wanted you to like him.
“It’s very liberating when you finally realize it’s impossible to make everyone like you. I wanted everybody to like me. I thought I was one shuck and jive away in every direction” he said.
I’m fairly certain that ‘a shuck and jive’ is the term John uses when he’s self-pleasuring over a picture on his iPhone of ‘sexual naplam’ Jessica Simpson in the bathroom in the mornings as Katy Perry sleeps off a hangover (because you’d have to be drunk to get in bed with John) in the next room.
(Katy: ‘What ya doin’ John?’ Mayer: ‘Oh uh just having a shuck and jive, be right there’).
I’m not sure if admitting you were a jerk and not apologising for it really means anything at all. I’m just hoping that Katy Perry snaps out of being mesmerised by whatever he’s currently doing to her lady garden and quick – before she lets him put a ring on it.